I am one of the luckiest people on earth. Why you might ask?
Because more than 50 years ago, William B Harding sacrificed everything so that I could
have a family. Happy flying in the newly formed Army Air Force, he loved the military....all the spit and polish, the order, the camaraderie, the honor to serve his country and lead other men.
He was also married to someone that made his world light up... my mom.
Yep...pretty much my dad was content to be in the Army, travel the world and love my mom. Well that is until they decided they wanted children. The hard news that children were not biological possible dealt them a hard blow and somehow later they decided to adopt.
One problem.
Men serving in the military weren't deemed "suitable" for adopting a child. What a stupid policy. How is it that he couldn't fly and we couldn't be a family if he was in the Army? I understand the thinking behind the policy and I know the 1950s can only be characterized as a decades where appearances was everything. A tragic policy that must have negatively impacted hundreds and thousands of lives.
He went into insurance...re-insurance in fact. And he was very good at it
and rose to the top of his company. He traveled the world again insuring the insurance companies against the risk of natural disasters. I don't imagine, though, that it replaced flying and the Army. But he never said a word to make me think this, it's just what I've surmised reading his journals that described how much he loved what he was doing. Maybe serving in both World War II and Korea changed it his mind....he was shot down numerous time and tells of the terror he felt trying to find his way back thru enemy territory. I don't know how he decided. But............... he adopted me.
Me. I never knew how much it cost him to do that. I grew up thinking he was the lucky one....that I completed his life....that he always dreamed of the life he'd have with me. Daddys are like that. They tell their daughters things and we believe them...100%. Thank goodness because that power changes us and makes us feel loved, secure and confident.
Could you find a bigger contrast in professions? I think he felt it was a fair trade, though. Little stuff makes me think that. For example, when he came home and I was waiting for him on the front porch (hey, it was the 50s and we did stuff like that), he was thrilled to see me there. Everyday he found something at the office to bring me....a cool stamp from a letter he had gotten in correspondence, a stick of gum, a paperclip he bent around in some goofy shape, maybe some old envelopes they didn't want anymore so I could lick and seal them, a penny he found on the sidewalk in downtown KC. You never knew which pocket and you never knew what cool tidbit it would be. He would laugh and laugh as I searched all his pockets until I found where he hid the surprise, he'd put his Fedora on my head and we'd walk up to the house together. Who does that if they're not happy?
He died in 1976 after a horrific battle with Pick's Disease. A disease that robs you of your cognitive powers and drags you down in the most agonizingly slow death. I hate that disease.

Going on 40 years he's been gone and I still miss him and I still love him. He's my Daddy and everyday I wish I could crawl up on the sofa beside him and talk away the hours about what he'd done that day and how my day went. We shared our love of reading and telling each other about our newest book. wouldn't it be wonderful to share adult titles....I wonder what you'd be reading today? When I got divorced, I ached to have him hold me and tell me everything was going to be OK. Nothing could have made me better except to have my Daddy help me walk thru those bleak and desperate days.
I believe he's just waiting for me and that someday we'll have all those walks and talks and I'll get to be near him again.
I hope that I can tell him that I know how much he gave up and thank him.
So Daddy....until then, I love you with all my heart and try every single day to live up to model of unconditional love in the way I treat my children. I try, as best I can, to keep you alive in the spirit of how I live my life and what a gift that's been. You're still parenting me and I can know in my heart of hearts what's the right thing to do when I think back to what you'd say...what a moral compass you set for me.
You were, are and will always be the best daddy a girl could ever want. Happy Father's Day.